Exposed

"This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine..this little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine. This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine. Let it shine, let it shine, let it shine."

(I promise I have a point...just bear with me...)

"Hide it under a bushel, NO! I'm gonna let it shine. Hide it under a bushel, NO! I'm gonna let it shine. Hide it under a bushel, NO! I'm gonna let it shine. Let it shine, let it shine, let it shine..."

Something about that old familiar children's church song rings true on so many levels. As I child, I can remember singing this in children's choir every year in Vacation Bible School. The Music Minister always stressed the importance of not hiding our love for Christ. As an adult, I still do find that message to be true.

However, I think that song speaks to more then just our Christianity.

I think it speaks in the very essence of how we should live our lives on a daily basis.

Open, Honest, Revealed and Brightly Shining.

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I've always been an open person when it comes to my life. I've blogged for years, sharing my deepest most thoughts with strangers and friends. I have no issue with sharing most aspects of my life with people. I never have. Not because I like to bore people with the details of my life, but rather I just believe in being truthful. If you ask me a question, I'm going to give you a straight answer. If you want to know something and you take the time to ask, I'll tell you what you want to know.

I've never understood people that are contained. Don't misunderstand: I am not saying people don't have the right to privacy. But there's a big difference between privacy and simply hiding things.

This has been an issue that is often debated in my own household. My boyfriend thinks I'm nosy. I consider myself to be interested. I don't believe in pressing people for information that is on a need to know basis. I respect that. I shouldn't be privelidged to what's going on in everyone's life. Nor should everyone be priviledged to know what's going on in mine.

However, that's the thing..when something is on a need to know basis...someone KNOWS. You aren't simply living a lie, or keeping secrets from everyone. You should be able to trust SOMEONE, and in the realm of that trust there should be NO NEED to hide things.

I think there's a fine line between privacy and hiding. If I'm having some sort of stomache bug and spend all day in the bathroom, I am not required to tell everyone that I see, "Hey guess what? I am sick as a dog and I'm home pooping my brains out." (Sorry, that's a little gross..but I'm trying to make my point stick. ) That's personal private information. But you can be assured that if I talk to my boyfriend that day, or my mom I'm not going to hide the fact that I'm ill from them. I'll spare them the gross details, but I'd want them to know that I don't feel well.

The same as if I have an illness in the family, or a close family member is having some personal issues. I'm not going to get on facebook and blast that to everyone that I know. However, you can bet that I'm not hiding that information from those that are closest to me. I'm worried, I'm afraid, I need to vent.....whatever it is, someone somewhere will be a trusted confidante for me.

The same if a friend confides an issue that they don't want getting out. I'm not going to go tell every person that I talk to that day. that information is confidential. It's on a need to know basis. But SOMEONE SOMEWHERE knows.

Hiding things, that's a different story entirely. When we hide something, it's not because it's personal or private. It's because we have a sense of guilt over what we are doing. Because deep down we know we shouldn't be doing whatever it is that we have opened ourselves up to, and if those people in our "Need to Know" catagory found out; Well, maybe we're afraid of what they would say or think or do.

I have issue with hiding things. If you feel that strongly that you must keep someone from someone, then nine times out of ten you are going to end up LYING about it, as well. Hiding leads to Lying.

I have a REALLY big problem with Lying.

Deceit leads to even worse things- Anger, Resentment, Betrayal, Confusion, Isolation, Aggressiveness, Defensiveness....and on and on and on.

No good comes from it and that cycle usually begins when we as individuals make the decision to hide an aspect of our life.

Sometimes, my significant other gets annoyed with me because he feels like I have to know everything. What he's done, where he's been, who he's been around. It's frustrating to me because I can't get him to understand that I'm not asking because I am entitled, or because he owes some explanation to me for his every move. I'm just interested. I'm interested in his day and what he's done. I want to have open communication where we can talk about random, unimportant events just as much as we can the really big huge things. I think if you can get into a pattern about talking about trivial matters, then sometime's it's easier to open up about the big things.

At least it is for me.

It's not an issue of entitlement, it's simply an issue of involvement. Being a part of your daily stuff. We should want to let our "people" in. Communication is one of THE most important aspects to ANY relationship- Sibling, friend, parent, spouse, boss...etc. etc. We are meant to be relational people, journeying TOGETHER. And you can't very well go on an journey together if one person is left out of the loop, right?

I tell him all the time that I am an open book. You want to ask me about my day? Shoot. You want to know who've I've talked to? Ask. Where I've been? Just gotta approach me. I'll tell you. I have no reason or need to hide that information.

Same goes for my habits. Now, am I going to tell every Tom, Dick and Jane that I'm a smoker? No. But, most people know I'm not usually far from my cigarette pack. Do I drink? On occasion. Not as much as I once did, because I recognized a serious dependency problem beginning and I had to put a stop to it.

See right there ya go, Open Book. Because I am NOT ASHAMED of WHO I AM, or of where I've been or what I've done. Am I pleased with all of my many life's choices? Well, Hell NO. But I've learned from them, and I've moved forward. One way for me to stay on track and accountable is to be OPEN. To have those people that I can trust with everything.

I never want to hide my light or my life in a bushel. It is in the light, that we are truly seen and can truly grow. It is out in the open that we might find out who we are. Not stumbling around in the dark.